Acceptance

Here is a surprise for everyone. Friday was to be day 1 of taking my clomid. I completely forgot to take them! And, to tell you the truth, I was not upset about it at all. There have been other things going on in our lives right now, that now, I just don't think that we are ready or really want to have a baby right now. I think that there is kind of a little bit of rebellion in with that mix too.

Saturday was the Tarpley reunion down at Berryville, on Allen's grandpa's ground. And ONCE AGAIN, some idiot comes up and asks if I'm going to keep up with her grandson, who just got married. I knew what was coming, so I replied, " Probably not", and she then exclaimed " Brandon and Melissa are expecting a baby in April !" whooopty doodle! I now think because of this, and due to me not wanting to put our our whole health history to everyone and their stupid dog, my response from now on is to be, " WE DON'T WANT ANY KIDS".... I think that is what everyone thinks anyway.

We are just at the point where we are sick of this worring and hoping, that we just actually want to live and enjoy our lives we have together. Is that too selfish? There are other things that I want to do in life besides becoming a mother. I want to go to either Alaska, or the Yukon, and go on a moose hunt with Allen. Besides, who knows exactly how long we will be here anyway. I would hate to spend the most last part of my life worried that we were not going to have kids, instead of enjoying what life has to offer.

So, now for the new hobby.

Anyone who knows us, knows that we do not just dabble in anything. I recently started shooting a bow again, and this will be the first year that I actually go out and try to take a deer with an archery permit. We have some other things in the planning stadges yet, which I hate to discuss before we even get started, so hopefully some new good news to come.

We have also been thinking very heavily about moving to Wyoming or Montanna. We absolutely LOVE these states. I am not at all a City Girl, or ever want to be. I think that Allen would rather stay in the truck than ever move to town either. We would both love to live out in the middle of nowhere, sit on the covered porch of a cabin, and watch the wildlife in the evening sunset. I could live like that and be as happy as a pig in mud.

So, with the economy like it is, and Allen's job not getting any better, we have really started to question living here in Olney.

Ohh, I almost forgot, since I have been trying not to think about it, Thursday night, someone tried to break in to Allen's truck. Allen thought he heard something up in the front of the truck, so he stuck his head out of the curtain. There on the side of the truck, was a man with his hand wrapped up, starting to swing his arm toward the window. He stopped when he saw Allen, then started to swing again. Allen unlocked the door and grabbed the latch to open the door, and kicked the door open, slinging the man onto the ground. Allen then jumped out of the truck, grabbing the bat and chased the mexican down the street. Allen failed to tell me anything about this until the next morning. Needless to say, neither Allen or I want him to run Chicago anymore.

SO, now you know why we want to move. We have actually really been thinking about it for that last few months. We shouldn't have a problem selling our house if we wanted to, so I'm not too worried about that. We really love our house and where it is at, but, with the current jobs open in Allen's field, there is not much around here that pays worth a hoot. My job can be transfered anywhere, so I'm not worried about it.

I don't know what to do, we are just both a the end of our ropes. I just know Allen will not be with Hancock's very much longer.